By Ahmed Dualeh Warsame
Overview
Marriage is an important issue in every society in the world because a great deal of emphasis has been given in the Holy Qur’an and the traditions to both marriage and having children and there is no better structure for marriage than this one Islam has founded or the tradition of our Prophet Mohamed (PBAH). Through marriage the procreation of mankind is continued. Children are the result of marriage and are important factors in stabilizing the family foundations as well as a source of real joy to their parents.
Who is a successful woman we can trust our future?
• She should win over her husband’s heart and be a source of comfort to him.
• She should encourage him to do good think while dissuading him from bad ones.
• She should also provide adequate measures to maintain his health and well-being.
• She should elevate her husband to a respected man even if he had been the lowest of all men.
• She should lead her husband to the peak of success or the dregs of misfortune.
• The results of her efforts are directed towards making the man into a kind and respected husband who would be a proper guardian for his family, and a good father from whom the children would seek guidance and respect. Allah, the All-Knowing has endowed woman with extraordinary power. The prosperity and happiness as well as the misery of the family are in her hands.
• She should know what her husband has gone through when he is at work. You do not know what obnoxious people he has had to deal with all the day. So, when he comes home, you should not present all of your complaints at the same time. He should not feel guilty of being a man. Be fair and be considerate to him. If you by grumbling and add to his worries, then he may either start a row or just leave the house and go to a cafe, cinema, or even walk around the streets. Find a suitable time and then present him with your genuine problems with in a consultative type of way.
Despite the financial difficulties that we are currently encountered, these circumstances do not allow our society to dare the foundation of a family which the overall estimated cost is rapidly increasing day after day due to the better live features that we are domestically acquiring. So I deliberately sure most of men are desperately discouraged to obtain a women who ever thought that her misconduct during wedding preparation or any other aspects that basically create miss-understanding may lead towards breaking up her family life.
Who is responsible the shortage of Somali Marriage men or girls?
Lack of patience same of the respondents of marriage research that I personally conducted are saying that, I have not yet seen my wife act like a proper housewife during all my married life. Our house is always in a mess. She is always shouting and abusing. I am fed up with her’. If she asked for all my wealth and or any other issue related the family development, the conflict will continue which you can simply anticipate that further conflict will sonly arise.
Lack of readiness If she wants to attract her husband’s attention or to show off, it is not an easy undertaking. Those women, who are unaware of this feature of their role, may find difficulty in fulfilling the other remaining task that the greater of this world (ALLAH) obligated principally.
Lack of respect: There is not anyone who does not have problems and grievances with regard to daily life. Everyone likes to have a sympathetic person with whom he can confide and who will listen to his problems. But the point to remember is that “there is a time and place for everything”. One should realize the proper time and occasion to complain. Some ignorant and selfish women do not realize that their husbands are very tired and nervous after a long day’s work. Instead of waiting an hour or two for him to regain his spirits, they start attacking him with a very slight of complaints.
In addition to that, the above mentioned information is quietly implies that the primary responsibilities of the shortage of Somali marriage goes to the girls who are the major obstacles of marriage continuation massively, when asks the girls who take his/her shoulder the responsibilities on this matter, they replies brilliantly, that they are innocent for this condemnation because we are the payers currently the family day to day financial activities when we realized the men’s are not committed for their major role.
Eventually, I cannot deny the men primary responsibilities is deliberately collapsed due to the financial constraints or the chewing Kat that ultimately dislocated the men required obligations of his family, but I am quite sure that if financial obstacles will obtain the optimum solution, the men responsibilities will be back on track soon.
I wish you the strength of all elements
Ahmed Dualeh Warsame
E-mail: ahmedducale@hotmail.com

Hargeysa Somaliland


 

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